December 31, 2018 raining and cold. 5:00 pm.
So my bank had a location closer to our home so I went in. From the very moment I entered I was met with a discomfort and confusion. This new credit union was unlike any bank I had ever been in, I felt stupid when I asked the one gentleman I saw when I walked in, "Where are the tellers?" he smiled and gestured to what looked like an ATM with shields on either side. I the said in a concerned tone, I don't have the debt card, that it was in my husband's possession. He again smiled and said not to worry as long as I had my ID.
After the woman at the little kiosk walked away the nice man escorted me to it. "Just let me get a service rep" A young woman then appeared on the screen and talked me through this new banking system. While everyone was very kind to me I could not help but think about what is going on in our country and even more severely in Asia and Sweden, being chipped! We are constantly being scanned by devices all over, like cell towers and now the 5G towers they are placing. Social Credit Scores are being implemented in China and the Swedes are eager to be micro-chipped
We are approaching Science fiction plots here and it is happening all around us while we are distracted by the dog and pony show "They" want us to see. These changes are coming at what I feel is an alarming rate. All the controversy, drama and insanity that is going on in our streets and college campus' and Government. It has become so politically charged that people are too busy rioting and watching as indictments are being unsealed and shining light on those who have been abusing their power and collectively committing treason and other atrocities.
I will be following up on some of these situations in more detail individually, including "Bohemian Grove", "Spirit Cooking", Pedophilia, human trafficking even murder. I am both anxious to see how it all plays out, with Q posting such accurate information, some believe it is actually JFK jr. behind "The Plan" and "the Great Awakening"and terrified at how our country is spiraling into a very dark place. As I said many of these things will be separated and posted about at another time. If you look at the GHW Bush's funeral some very odd things took place, why have we not heard more about this?
May you have a wonderful New year, can't wait to see what 2019 has in store for us!
LB
Monday 31 December 2018
Be Prepared when the SHTF
In the event that we have an attempt to wipe out our power grid, causing a national blackout, like an EMP attack
Will you be ready?
Below is a list of useful items to help make life a little better if such a terror attack does cause a shut down of our entire power grid. In addition, don't under estimate the power of goodwill you can save some money when it will be needed elsewhere.
- Bottled Water at least 1 gallon per person
- Canned Foods
- Rice, Beans, Wheat, Flour and Yeast.
- Water Filters/Purifiers
- Charcoal. not just for cooking & heat, can be used to purify water
- Cooking Oils
- Milk powdered and condensed.
- Salt
- Cast iron pots and dutch ovens are long lasting and are made to be used over an open fire.
- Gardening Supplies seeds, books, and tools
- Canning supplies including the jars, lids, pressure cookers, pectin, and other supplies
- Jerky and other long lasting meats.
- Teas, Coffee, Powered beverages.
- Hygiene supplies shampoo, toothbrushes and
toothpaste , mouthwash, floss, etc - First aid kits
- OTC meds. Pain relievers, Fever reducers, cold & flu, cough syrup.
- Toilet Paper, Kleenex, Paper Towels
- Vitamins and Herbal Supplements
- Gas masks
- Flashlights, lanterns, and glowsticks. And don’t forget the batteries or fuel.
- Candles
- Lighters, matches, flint and steel fire starters, fire pistons
- Saws, axes, hatchets, machetes, hunting knives, sharpening stones and honing oil.
- Fishing supplies/tools
- Tarps, plastic rolls, nails, rope, hammers and spikes to improvise an shelter.
- Gasoline Containers or anything that could be a gas or water container.
- Gloves, scarves, hats, earmuffs etc
- Boots, belts, warm comfortable clothes, thick socks.
- Cold weather clothing and weather clothing
- Bleach
- Knives & Sharpening tools
- Backpacks, Duffel Bags
- Large garbage cans and garbage bags can be used for trash, storage, water collection, hauling goods etc. Garbage bags have dozens and dozens of uses, the thick 55 gallon size being the best.
- Paper, pads, pencils, sharpeners, pens, and solar calculators
- Sleeping Bags, Blankets, Pillows, Mats and Inflatable Mattresses.
- Buckets of all sizes and shapes
- Plastic Wrap and Insulation
- Glue, duct tape, nails, nuts, bolts, screws
- Aluminum foil. Can be used for cooking and to harness some power from the sun for purifying water and cooking.
- Prescription medications.
- Duct Tape and Electrical Tape
- Hand pumps & siphons for gas, water, oil
Wednesday 19 December 2018
"It can't all be just me"
Wednesday December 19, 2018 41° sunny 11:28 am
Working on my nails for Christmas, speaking of which I am perfectly fine with Happy Holidays seeing as there are so many holidays this month and I appreciate the good intentions and Joy. I can not believe they are complaining about a classic Christmas song, "Baby it's cold outside" being a sexual harassment?! If that is the case we need to do the same and bitch about the word Gay being in other songs or animal abuse in 12 days of Christmas. I mean those who want to ban such things are only showing how selfish they really are. Where is the equal rights?
1:16 pm
Things not to say to a person dealing with PTSD, Anxiety, and Schizophrenic Bipolar Disorders:
"I am going through all of what your going through plus I have the added stress over the finances now and you don't see me on medications and calling off work" or "When is it going to be my turn" Trust me, you don't want this for you to have your turn we don't appreciate such under playing of mental heath issues and how it affects us when you can't possibly know what is going on inside. Just a tip from your favorite mental patient (which I am) Hence the title of Ramblings of a Mad Hatter.
Pleahen you say such things, hang up then call back only to ask if I am going in our not despite telling you I have a nauseating migraine that has come on due the stress and fighting between my now 15 year old son and his father then dragging me deeply into that negativity and then getting mad and bringing up how I am lucky my work is allowing me to work part time and here I go taking off a day... and yet another call now, the ringer is killing me. and again! it's 1:41 and he has called me 4 times, I ended hanging up on him even after I said "If you are going to keep calling me while I am feeling like this I will hang up on you" you then say "Well its annoying as hell, you have to stop letting these things get to you and risk loosing your job. You can't just call in when things are a little tough". ,I am going to lay down and turn the freakin phone off.
4:28 pm
So he called 2 more times since I last wrote, asking if I went to post office to which I said I had not gone out at all due to my headache. When I offered to take it he said "well if you can do that you can go to work" I said dropping an envelope into a post box is in no way like working multiple hours. He keeps insisting our family is dysfunctional and that the therapist whom we have only seen 2-3 times tops and he doesn't see where this therapist is helping at all. So I am off to the post office TTFN
Working on my nails for Christmas, speaking of which I am perfectly fine with Happy Holidays seeing as there are so many holidays this month and I appreciate the good intentions and Joy. I can not believe they are complaining about a classic Christmas song, "Baby it's cold outside" being a sexual harassment?! If that is the case we need to do the same and bitch about the word Gay being in other songs or animal abuse in 12 days of Christmas. I mean those who want to ban such things are only showing how selfish they really are. Where is the equal rights?
1:16 pm
Things not to say to a person dealing with PTSD, Anxiety, and Schizophrenic Bipolar Disorders:
"I am going through all of what your going through plus I have the added stress over the finances now and you don't see me on medications and calling off work" or "When is it going to be my turn" Trust me, you don't want this for you to have your turn we don't appreciate such under playing of mental heath issues and how it affects us when you can't possibly know what is going on inside. Just a tip from your favorite mental patient (which I am) Hence the title of Ramblings of a Mad Hatter.
Pleahen you say such things, hang up then call back only to ask if I am going in our not despite telling you I have a nauseating migraine that has come on due the stress and fighting between my now 15 year old son and his father then dragging me deeply into that negativity and then getting mad and bringing up how I am lucky my work is allowing me to work part time and here I go taking off a day... and yet another call now, the ringer is killing me. and again! it's 1:41 and he has called me 4 times, I ended hanging up on him even after I said "If you are going to keep calling me while I am feeling like this I will hang up on you" you then say "Well its annoying as hell, you have to stop letting these things get to you and risk loosing your job. You can't just call in when things are a little tough". ,I am going to lay down and turn the freakin phone off.
4:28 pm
So he called 2 more times since I last wrote, asking if I went to post office to which I said I had not gone out at all due to my headache. When I offered to take it he said "well if you can do that you can go to work" I said dropping an envelope into a post box is in no way like working multiple hours. He keeps insisting our family is dysfunctional and that the therapist whom we have only seen 2-3 times tops and he doesn't see where this therapist is helping at all. So I am off to the post office TTFN
His new comments on "it can't all be me" every time he argues with our son is driving me insaner
Tuesday 18 December 2018
December 17-18, 2018
Monday December 17, 2018 42° blue skies and sunny. Listening to Edge of Wonder
Got called into work tomorrow & Wednesday so I start at 1 pm till 7 pm am. I may have mentioned this but I always wondered who decides what is in and what things are popular for this year etc.
Again, somewhat predictive programming geared at our children and continues through adulthood. Who controls all we see and hear and much to our complacency and laziness. We are accepting which ever news outlet or programs we agree with, have a narrative that fits their own ideals.
For example, you see billboards and advertisements everywhere and hidden within these personal attacks that we happily allow in our lives unknowingly letting our brains and senses be manipulated from the clothes we wear, music we listen to, and TV / Cinema. We are exposed to an overwhelming amount of these programming tools that make us numbed.So many people are programmed to want the "next big thing". Look what happens on Black Friday, people acting like animals fighting for food, lining up outside in a line overnight just to get the hottest tech the day it hits stores.
Now think about how much time not just we, but our children are plugged in, this generation is addicted to technology. Banks and credit companies have pretty much done away with the magnetic strip replacing it with a small chip, there is even talk about human chipping. We would be virtually at the mercy of those who know how to use these things to track us, access our devices and information. I really get worried when while working I see just how dangerous this card chip can be from a personal perspective. Those who get you chipped bank or credit card can all too easily use your card and not have to sign! No need for a pin number or signature anymore, and they say it is far more secure? What are they smoking and where can I get some.
We are all living a "Truman Show" life. Everything we do or say is captured someway and held in some huge computer data storage facility. People pass comments of feeling like they are in a movie or some similar sensation and in some respects we are. The powers that be, and not the good ones, train us to accept their agendas not ours. WWGOWGA
LB
Got called into work tomorrow & Wednesday so I start at 1 pm till 7 pm am. I may have mentioned this but I always wondered who decides what is in and what things are popular for this year etc.
Again, somewhat predictive programming geared at our children and continues through adulthood. Who controls all we see and hear and much to our complacency and laziness. We are accepting which ever news outlet or programs we agree with, have a narrative that fits their own ideals.
For example, you see billboards and advertisements everywhere and hidden within these personal attacks that we happily allow in our lives unknowingly letting our brains and senses be manipulated from the clothes we wear, music we listen to, and TV / Cinema. We are exposed to an overwhelming amount of these programming tools that make us numbed.So many people are programmed to want the "next big thing". Look what happens on Black Friday, people acting like animals fighting for food, lining up outside in a line overnight just to get the hottest tech the day it hits stores.
Now think about how much time not just we, but our children are plugged in, this generation is addicted to technology. Banks and credit companies have pretty much done away with the magnetic strip replacing it with a small chip, there is even talk about human chipping. We would be virtually at the mercy of those who know how to use these things to track us, access our devices and information. I really get worried when while working I see just how dangerous this card chip can be from a personal perspective. Those who get you chipped bank or credit card can all too easily use your card and not have to sign! No need for a pin number or signature anymore, and they say it is far more secure? What are they smoking and where can I get some.
We are all living a "Truman Show" life. Everything we do or say is captured someway and held in some huge computer data storage facility. People pass comments of feeling like they are in a movie or some similar sensation and in some respects we are. The powers that be, and not the good ones, train us to accept their agendas not ours. WWGOWGA
LB
Sunday 16 December 2018
Betrayal and more bewilderment
Thursday December 13, 2018 38° 10:30 pm misty rain but not too cold.
At the job I am simply glad I have it despite my groaning, we NEED the money. I started at $8 something but was told it would be 9 in like a week after I would start. Fast forward 2 years 9 months of loyalty, Exceptional customer service even got employee due to the surveys coming in praised me for how helpful etc I was. Over this time I have had 2 reviews, however I was put on short term leave before I could get my 3rd for this year.
Anyway, Since the they have hired a few new people, ok, but when I come back someone who was just hired in September started at $13.50?! Then this other new employee got a promotion over me. I have given a great deal of myself for this company and yet I get shafted by management when I definitely have a LONG history of customer service yet that is the very reason this woman started at 13.50. I need to find a job that appreciate me, they were, after all responsible for my issues of mental and heart which caused me to go on leave.
I was all excited to see The Geminid meteor shower which the peak time will be between 10:30 pm 12/13/18 through the weekend But the morning isn't your only chance. On Thursday and Friday, keep an eye on the sky a few hours after sunset -- just keep the moon at your back. the most meteors passing will be around 7:30 am. Here's when and where to watch the last and strongest meteor shower of the year
Sunday December 16, 2018 44° clear, and cold
Once again my brain is overloaded, will write Tomorrow since I do not have work until next Saturday (unless someone calls in or something. Oh yeah one more thing, All employees wage has risen to $10 so Zach was almost right but not for the reasons he had thought. The other employee is NOT making 13.50 and I was made to feel much better, found that out yesterday when I asked my manager. For now I shall retire with a nice hand rolled jillybean.
a key for those just reading:
Green = medical cannabis
Dark Lavender = Headings = BOLD
Light Lavender = Links - smaller font
Will add more as needed ✌
At the job I am simply glad I have it despite my groaning, we NEED the money. I started at $8 something but was told it would be 9 in like a week after I would start. Fast forward 2 years 9 months of loyalty, Exceptional customer service even got employee due to the surveys coming in praised me for how helpful etc I was. Over this time I have had 2 reviews, however I was put on short term leave before I could get my 3rd for this year.
Anyway, Since the they have hired a few new people, ok, but when I come back someone who was just hired in September started at $13.50?! Then this other new employee got a promotion over me. I have given a great deal of myself for this company and yet I get shafted by management when I definitely have a LONG history of customer service yet that is the very reason this woman started at 13.50. I need to find a job that appreciate me, they were, after all responsible for my issues of mental and heart which caused me to go on leave.
I was all excited to see The Geminid meteor shower which the peak time will be between 10:30 pm 12/13/18 through the weekend But the morning isn't your only chance. On Thursday and Friday, keep an eye on the sky a few hours after sunset -- just keep the moon at your back. the most meteors passing will be around 7:30 am. Here's when and where to watch the last and strongest meteor shower of the year
Sunday December 16, 2018 44° clear, and cold
Once again my brain is overloaded, will write Tomorrow since I do not have work until next Saturday (unless someone calls in or something. Oh yeah one more thing, All employees wage has risen to $10 so Zach was almost right but not for the reasons he had thought. The other employee is NOT making 13.50 and I was made to feel much better, found that out yesterday when I asked my manager. For now I shall retire with a nice hand rolled jillybean.
a key for those just reading:
Green = medical cannabis
Dark Lavender = Headings = BOLD
Light Lavender = Links - smaller font
Will add more as needed ✌
Wednesday 12 December 2018
Birthdays and Bewilderment
December 11, 2018 27 ° 2:13 pm chilly but sunny
Getting ready to pick up my handsome son, Tomorrow is his fifteenth birthday! I am so very proud of him, he is beautiful inside and out. His soul is old and he is wiser than his years. I do fear however, that he may have inherited my empathetic gift. Going to Yummy Asian Bistro for sushi and fried rice. My son enjoyed himself and we had a wonderful evening.
December 12, 2018 23 9:20 pm cold and dreary all day. (Watching my favorite YouTube channels Edge of wonder.)
Population culling. That is what has been on my mind recently, with the suspicious packages sent to various political figures including Soros and Clintons. When I think about all the ways we can and possibly are being controlled:
Geo-engineering and weaponizing of weather. Chem-trails and cloud seeding are just two ways to cause widespread contaminating agents. Not saying creating a real life Walking Dead Zombie apocalypse, but very well spread a mild cotangent that can weed out the weaker while the stronger a persons immunity would dictate what level a person is forming something like Gattica, a movie I highly recommend it.
GMO and animal steroids, pesticides and chemicals in our produce and more. There are so many ways they are directly manipulating our DNA and world. We have been unwittingly subjected to massive bombardment of assaults. We are willing lab rats for the hierarchy, we eat the fast food containing chemicals to make us crave it. We know it is not good for us but we just can't seem to stay away from it. We all have a weakness, be it wine, beer, fast food, drugs, sex, etc and we buckle and give in even if only once in a very while.
Frequencies and vibrations are another area we are constantly being manipulated by and many don't know it. All that stuff we tinfoil hat wearing conspiracy theorists say about how the higher powers are streaming various frequency waves to be received by parts of our brain we don't even know about. hmmm Starting to ramble, need sleep/ LB
Getting ready to pick up my handsome son, Tomorrow is his fifteenth birthday! I am so very proud of him, he is beautiful inside and out. His soul is old and he is wiser than his years. I do fear however, that he may have inherited my empathetic gift. Going to Yummy Asian Bistro for sushi and fried rice. My son enjoyed himself and we had a wonderful evening.
December 12, 2018 23 9:20 pm cold and dreary all day. (Watching my favorite YouTube channels Edge of wonder.)
Population culling. That is what has been on my mind recently, with the suspicious packages sent to various political figures including Soros and Clintons. When I think about all the ways we can and possibly are being controlled:
Geo-engineering and weaponizing of weather. Chem-trails and cloud seeding are just two ways to cause widespread contaminating agents. Not saying creating a real life Walking Dead Zombie apocalypse, but very well spread a mild cotangent that can weed out the weaker while the stronger a persons immunity would dictate what level a person is forming something like Gattica, a movie I highly recommend it.
Frequencies and vibrations are another area we are constantly being manipulated by and many don't know it. All that stuff we tinfoil hat wearing conspiracy theorists say about how the higher powers are streaming various frequency waves to be received by parts of our brain we don't even know about. hmmm Starting to ramble, need sleep/ LB
Saturday 8 December 2018
Friday 7 December 2018
December 7, 2018
Friday December 7, 2018 5:18 pm 23° Cold. I am putting links for each.
The sun was out earlier with an ever so light flurry.On my way to the river, where I recharge and write usually in notebook but I can access this through my phone to update this.
WTAF is going on around the world right now yet we are not hearing?!
1. Russia's tension with America over US Air strikes in Syria. as well as the Crisis in Ukraine
2. Hawaii had an island SINK
3. Scientists want to know why Yellowstone's Steamboat Geyser keeps erupting
4. Volcanic activity in Hawaii, Indonisia and Guatemala
5. Massive Flood, Sink hols & Land slide increase
6. Tsunami again poor Indonesia, they had 3 natural disasters withing same year.
7. The Unusual fires in California, Yes I said unusual. First, there was the mass shooting at the same time-frame, hours before the two simultaneous fires start.. Look at this then truly look at the damage AND lack of damage here Captured by this drone
Don't even get me started in modified weather, that is a whole other post! But with all this "natural" disasters I would not be surprised that the strange "sky quakes" could be the groaning and such as the tectonic plates shift. Another whole other post, matter of fact I hope to do posts on each along with the immigrant caravan all at the same time.
🤔💫Pondering and entertaining the though that perhaps all the creatures of fairy-tales are actually "aliens races"? Shall look into this more...
8:58 pm 18° Colder than a witch's tit
So my husband has been, how do I say, Nagging me? About "I don't understand why you would just walk away from a steady job like that after a few years, that was very irresponsible of you". I try to explain that at that time I genuinely had to, even the doctor placed me on short term leave that day. I was re-diagnosed, it wasn't a choice. Even after I told him if I hadn't I would be dead now. Yet I took on a shift in another store and am even working more hours a day than doctor wrote but nope I am being selfish and when I say "I don't know what you want me to say", then I genuinely say sorry and his response is "Yeah, I always get that,bye".
December 6 , 2018
Thursday December 6th 25° 11:01 am Damn cold! can see the sun but cloudy haze like. (𝆕𝆕Carousel (KXA Remix 𝆕𝆕)
So far so good, Husband was very sweet and gave me $25 for me however I want to spend and has only called once to remind me to call the Disability lawyers. Unfortunately given my age and the fact I have not worked a solid 5 years and thus for my age I do not have enough credits to qualify. In addition to that the other disability is out since hubby makes "too much". So I shall stay with Walgreen's as long as I can. Trouble is the hours, now I can only do max of 25 a week and can't drive at night. Another thing, since I was wrong yesterday, Today I have a 2 pm appointment with Dr. Debbie. Lawyer confirmed I need more credits which are earned by quarters, every thee months.
Can't help but wonder what is so special about Saturday, Dec 8th, But I feel it will be... Something, maybe a final acknowledgement of aliens and a potential invasion. Predictive programming would make perfect sense, think the classic and hilarious MIB. The shadow government slowly releases information once they feel we have become "ready" in their opinion to have stuff leaked or Declassified. Q is warning of this date as well, could we be going to war? All I do know is I will be working 9-5.
11:57 am 29°
Controversy. Dr. Kevorkian was right human euthanasia just like our pets we love so much. As someone who feels utter depression and great times but I tend to feel not as ME as I should. My mom was close to the end I watched her change before my eyes. She was miserable and suffering, her quality of life was near none. She was in and out of doctors, hospitals and eventually hospice all the time having blood taken, taking 20 pills a day which I feel caused her quicker demise. I felt horribly guilty because on some of her worst nights, being put on oxygen and needing open heart surgery after the new year, where she was near tears over how she felt. She herself would say "Please just take me cause if this is how I have to live I don't want it".
She was just living to see my brother on more time and that was Christmas 2016 when he was going to come here. He did and we had them take a photo while he was here, then less then a month later she passed, where I found her on a Sunday morning. I still cry and miss her badly, Over the summer we went to Florida where I got to finally see a portion of my family which was in July just before my breakdown. It had been over 15 years since seeing them and we are all so much older now. My Aunt & Uncle, Dad's brother and Aunt Joann whom set up my mom and dad. My cousins whom I had been very close to when we all lived in NY, and their children at similar ages to my son. It was bittersweet, I love them all and miss being able to drive to see them now we are very far apart.
Well, going to go get me a mocha and get ready for Dr. appointment.
So far so good, Husband was very sweet and gave me $25 for me however I want to spend and has only called once to remind me to call the Disability lawyers. Unfortunately given my age and the fact I have not worked a solid 5 years and thus for my age I do not have enough credits to qualify. In addition to that the other disability is out since hubby makes "too much". So I shall stay with Walgreen's as long as I can. Trouble is the hours, now I can only do max of 25 a week and can't drive at night. Another thing, since I was wrong yesterday, Today I have a 2 pm appointment with Dr. Debbie. Lawyer confirmed I need more credits which are earned by quarters, every thee months.
Can't help but wonder what is so special about Saturday, Dec 8th, But I feel it will be... Something, maybe a final acknowledgement of aliens and a potential invasion. Predictive programming would make perfect sense, think the classic and hilarious MIB. The shadow government slowly releases information once they feel we have become "ready" in their opinion to have stuff leaked or Declassified. Q is warning of this date as well, could we be going to war? All I do know is I will be working 9-5.
11:57 am 29°
Controversy. Dr. Kevorkian was right human euthanasia just like our pets we love so much. As someone who feels utter depression and great times but I tend to feel not as ME as I should. My mom was close to the end I watched her change before my eyes. She was miserable and suffering, her quality of life was near none. She was in and out of doctors, hospitals and eventually hospice all the time having blood taken, taking 20 pills a day which I feel caused her quicker demise. I felt horribly guilty because on some of her worst nights, being put on oxygen and needing open heart surgery after the new year, where she was near tears over how she felt. She herself would say "Please just take me cause if this is how I have to live I don't want it".
She was just living to see my brother on more time and that was Christmas 2016 when he was going to come here. He did and we had them take a photo while he was here, then less then a month later she passed, where I found her on a Sunday morning. I still cry and miss her badly, Over the summer we went to Florida where I got to finally see a portion of my family which was in July just before my breakdown. It had been over 15 years since seeing them and we are all so much older now. My Aunt & Uncle, Dad's brother and Aunt Joann whom set up my mom and dad. My cousins whom I had been very close to when we all lived in NY, and their children at similar ages to my son. It was bittersweet, I love them all and miss being able to drive to see them now we are very far apart.
Well, going to go get me a mocha and get ready for Dr. appointment.
Wednesday 5 December 2018
November 5, 2018
Wednesday 7:34 am 27° another gray cold day... Snow Lotus shake
Mind is processing the following bits today will write some of it later: We are Truman of the Truman Show. I always asked who decided what things were called or who decided to say blue is blue and not apple. I do hope you get the idea there. There are so many topics going around, but what if it was "written" that way. That our lives are like a sim game.
10:37 am 25°
Husband has called for the 4th time...
Finance seems to be one of the bigger factors to my anxiety and panic attacks. Husband's most recent call was because $300 is suddenly missing from our account, the one I closed my account to join into, their site had been down all day yesterday, did we get hacked, did they? WTAF My appointment with therapist at 1:00 pm. Last few days been having trouble with my hands shaking more than normal and a sharp pain in the back of my hand. It is similar to whacking your funny bone hard. This does alert me however that a panic attack is arriving and I need to take my Xanax.💢🖤
Seriously, we are so enslaved with life. Everything costs, How can I afford to be ill? When I am unable to work and go on leave, Since September 6th I have paid over $200 in co-pays alone not to mention the 14 medications I take each day that add hundreds more. In addition to having my credit card being compromised to over the limit and now now salary. Well I did start back at work BUT it appears I will have only worked 3 day for one pay period (2 weeks).
11:21 am 34° called 6th time -cell then land and again rustled my feathers about how I seriously need to find more hours or another job to provide more income despite the restrictions my doctor has placed on me, and he wonders why I have anxiety and panic attacks?! The panic attacks also affect my heart and the shaking of my limbs that is not my control. should be a fun visit with Dr. Debbie. All my life I have had people tell me "You should write a book" when ever I told them stories from my life. That was why I would journal, I liked to use composition note books of the various events that essentially were my life in little nuggets. That is how I plan to use this. Let me know if you want to see those too.
4:43 pm 31° Alan Walker & Sia - Faded/Cheap Thrills/Alive/Airplanes (feat. Hayley Williams, B.o.B, Sean Paul)
3 more times since last typed. he is doing his magic tonight so I have started to do my nails, should have a picture a little later. My right hand still getting sharp pains, reminds me of a time before my father passed (so at least March 2003) they never did figure out what was wrong. I under went MRI's, Cat-scans, EEG (THAT sucked) it started with pains then my hands locked up in almost a flat fist that I would have to pry open as I couldn't do on own, no control over my hands for like a month. Hope it is not happening again, I loose all control from wrist down. Thank God for spellcheck.
11:00 pm 31°
My hand hurts more so I go to bed.
Tuesday 4 December 2018
Tuesday November 4, 2018
This is so much harder than I thought it would be. I no longer have money on me, if I want/need money I have to ask for it. That being said lets get on with the current entry.
Tuesday December 4, 2018 1:25 pm 31° just dreary gray. no music just silence.
My husband has now called for the 9th time today to either remind me of what I need to do (laundry, dishes, sanding drywall etc.), what am I making for dinner, and once again going over why he doesn't understand why I would leave my full time job and go on short term medical leave when I knew the financial burden it would cause and the responsibility I have to pay various bills. Despite knowing how stressful the job had become, contributing to my heart issues back in April this year.
Why I thought it necessary to go on short term leave is because my doctor wrote a form out instructing as such. So from September 6 - November 23, I was on leave all the while I under went much psychological testing, therapy and medications which would be tweaked every so often as they regulated dosages etc. All of which mind you has an additional price tag attached to it. $30 co-pay a week just to see both doctor and therapist only to learn in addition to my preexisting PTSD, anxiety and major depressive disorders it was discovered I am also Schizo-affective Bipolar. How does this affect me? Guess what, yup in addition to the 7 meds for my hear that I have to take for basically the rest of my life I get an additional 6 meds, did I mention I HATE big Pharma and believe they keep us ill so we need even more meds etc, which was why my previous therapist got me a start issued medical cannabis card.
Since my atrial-fibrillation episode in early and being thrust on 7 pills they put a stint into my widow-maker due to an 85% blockage, I am only 48! That my friends is why I had to leave my job for a little while, I have returned to work actually, though my doctor wrote out the limitations to my working conditions, I am to be at 25 hours the most and no more than 6 hours a day, 4 days a week and must be able to leave during daylight hours. So thus far as of November 25th I have worked 3 days and they have not yet put me on schedule for the entire next week, the Wednesday after tomorrow. Now about the meds I started taking in April... Most of them had the side affect "may cause depression", one even said significant depression. So as one can imagine, already having the handful of acronyms this only matters far worse..
As for my focus, memory and motor skills, I have to use spell check all the time now as even thought I think I am typing the right thing it inevitably comes up misspelled anyway. And once again had to call said doctor's office to get my appointment date/times because I could not remember. It really sucks, you feel like you don't have a grasp of your own life, you begin questioning everything. Did I say that, when did I do this etc. You feel like a huge burden to those around you, you even can become so far as to feel worthless.
Tuesday December 4, 2018 1:25 pm 31° just dreary gray. no music just silence.
My husband has now called for the 9th time today to either remind me of what I need to do (laundry, dishes, sanding drywall etc.), what am I making for dinner, and once again going over why he doesn't understand why I would leave my full time job and go on short term medical leave when I knew the financial burden it would cause and the responsibility I have to pay various bills. Despite knowing how stressful the job had become, contributing to my heart issues back in April this year.
Why I thought it necessary to go on short term leave is because my doctor wrote a form out instructing as such. So from September 6 - November 23, I was on leave all the while I under went much psychological testing, therapy and medications which would be tweaked every so often as they regulated dosages etc. All of which mind you has an additional price tag attached to it. $30 co-pay a week just to see both doctor and therapist only to learn in addition to my preexisting PTSD, anxiety and major depressive disorders it was discovered I am also Schizo-affective Bipolar. How does this affect me? Guess what, yup in addition to the 7 meds for my hear that I have to take for basically the rest of my life I get an additional 6 meds, did I mention I HATE big Pharma and believe they keep us ill so we need even more meds etc, which was why my previous therapist got me a start issued medical cannabis card.
Since my atrial-fibrillation episode in early and being thrust on 7 pills they put a stint into my widow-maker due to an 85% blockage, I am only 48! That my friends is why I had to leave my job for a little while, I have returned to work actually, though my doctor wrote out the limitations to my working conditions, I am to be at 25 hours the most and no more than 6 hours a day, 4 days a week and must be able to leave during daylight hours. So thus far as of November 25th I have worked 3 days and they have not yet put me on schedule for the entire next week, the Wednesday after tomorrow. Now about the meds I started taking in April... Most of them had the side affect "may cause depression", one even said significant depression. So as one can imagine, already having the handful of acronyms this only matters far worse..
As for my focus, memory and motor skills, I have to use spell check all the time now as even thought I think I am typing the right thing it inevitably comes up misspelled anyway. And once again had to call said doctor's office to get my appointment date/times because I could not remember. It really sucks, you feel like you don't have a grasp of your own life, you begin questioning everything. Did I say that, when did I do this etc. You feel like a huge burden to those around you, you even can become so far as to feel worthless.
Sunday 2 December 2018
Why is no one talking about this?!
Since November 26 through December 1 2018 we have had the following:
Earthquakes
11/26 5.6 in Fiji
11/26 5.5 in Peurto Vallarta, Jalisco Mexico
11/27 5.8 in Monrovia, Liberia
11/27 5.8 in Vanuatu
11/27 5.6 in Bridgetown, Barbados
11/29 5.7 in North Sumatra, Indonesia
11/30 5.7 in Anchorage, AK
11/30 7.0 in Anchorage, AK
12/01 5.2 in Anchorage, AK
12/01 6.3 in Lospalos, Timor-Leste
12/01 5.5 in Navidad, Chili
You can find even more cases of increasing extreme weather Here
Hawaii lost an island!! I have asked various people if they had known that in October of this year one of the remote islands, East Island, home to the Hawaiian Monk Seals. Gone, it ceases to be, all due to a hurricane off the pacific! Why was this not in the news? Or the massive flash floods, landslides, and Tsunamis
They have admitted to "seeding" clouds, the brilliant Dr. Michio Kaku has often commented on the abilities that can be used in Geo-engineering. Sulphur Dioxide, and God knows what else is being shot into clouds to either cause or prevent various weather situations. They have managed to weaponize the weather. And what the hell is this?!
There is a super volcano (1 of 20) around the world that is more than 40,000 years over due to erupt under Yellowstone National Park. On Sept. 15, The Ear Spring geyser erupted in its most violent display since 1957. Sprays of steaming water leapt up to 30 feet (9 meters) in the air, Spewing chunks of rock and dirt as well as decades of human made debris.
The strange "skyquakes" and other sounds that are happening all around the world in increasing in both severity and frequency. Even causing odd behaviors of birds and animals, check out this video of birds taking over a Walmart parking lot, or these bizarre sounds that are worldwide along with other unusual events.
I will be posting more on these epic events as they continue.
LB
Sunday December 2, 2018
36° rain and snow. (Havana playing) The realization that I no longer have my own bank account is setting in. While I know it must be done as my confidence is not so good and I this way I won't be able to cause any problems but it still sucks. 🌌♨
Earn/Win 'Free ...' Apps (reviews part 1)
Anyone with a cell phone gets inundated with app ads. So I decided I would start putting them to the test and clue folks in. I will use a ☑ rating system based on ease of use, level of marketing (how many ads you need to deal with), Earning rate, and lastly Payout. So 1-5 rating 5 being the best.
☑
☑☑
☑☑☑
☑☑☑☑
☑☑☑☑☑
Earn free PayPal Money: ☑☑☑
If you have patience and time, this app allows you unlimited viewing of video add for 40 coins per view as well as other ways to earn points like daily gift of 20, 2 Lucky spins every two hours, App of the day and more. The number of ad pops are average for a "Free" game. Pay out starts at 10,000 coins = $10.00. Not my favorite but easy to use and fairly quick point collection. If you like you can use the referral code: TXUsw3x
Lucky Day - win real money: ☑☑☑
Fun little scratcher app with many tickets to scratch and you always win Something you get to scratch 3 tickets per advertisement. Typical winnings are 'coins' useable on buying more raffle or Lottery entries. You get a limited number of cards each day but it is a decent amount. As of today I have won a total of $8. there are 2 raffles, 1 is daily the other weekly. You redeem (cash out) via Paypal or other gift cards
Free Bitcoin Spinner: ☑☑☑☑☑
I know the Spinner actually pays out at any amount but you have a 3 day cooldown, meaning you can not cash out for 3 days after. Very easy and it gives you 50,000 "credits" you can choose between bets of 3k or 5k but the credit meter restarts rising so you can play as often as you have 3000 or 5000 accordingly. Each spin garners an add, many of which you can just close, some may have counters.
Bitdrip: ☑☑☑☑
Easy to use, can claim BTC ever 4 minutes, I have only had this for a week and honestly I do not claim as often as I could but payout is automatically transferred to your bit wallet. I especially like that it is so quick you don't have to deal with ads, big plus IMHO. Will update if I feel it falls short
Cloud BTC Miner: ☑
Very confusing, I am not even sure I got my satoshi even though I "cashed out" there was a timeout but when I reopened, the satoshi was gone and I started over from 0. Also very slow accumulation. No ads but laggy and slow to earn.
Coinbase: ☑☑☑☑
☑
☑☑
☑☑☑
☑☑☑☑
☑☑☑☑☑
Earn free PayPal Money: ☑☑☑
If you have patience and time, this app allows you unlimited viewing of video add for 40 coins per view as well as other ways to earn points like daily gift of 20, 2 Lucky spins every two hours, App of the day and more. The number of ad pops are average for a "Free" game. Pay out starts at 10,000 coins = $10.00. Not my favorite but easy to use and fairly quick point collection. If you like you can use the referral code: TXUsw3x
Lucky Day - win real money: ☑☑☑
Fun little scratcher app with many tickets to scratch and you always win Something you get to scratch 3 tickets per advertisement. Typical winnings are 'coins' useable on buying more raffle or Lottery entries. You get a limited number of cards each day but it is a decent amount. As of today I have won a total of $8. there are 2 raffles, 1 is daily the other weekly. You redeem (cash out) via Paypal or other gift cards
Free Bitcoin Spinner: ☑☑☑☑☑
I know the Spinner actually pays out at any amount but you have a 3 day cooldown, meaning you can not cash out for 3 days after. Very easy and it gives you 50,000 "credits" you can choose between bets of 3k or 5k but the credit meter restarts rising so you can play as often as you have 3000 or 5000 accordingly. Each spin garners an add, many of which you can just close, some may have counters.
Bitdrip: ☑☑☑☑
Easy to use, can claim BTC ever 4 minutes, I have only had this for a week and honestly I do not claim as often as I could but payout is automatically transferred to your bit wallet. I especially like that it is so quick you don't have to deal with ads, big plus IMHO. Will update if I feel it falls short
Cloud BTC Miner: ☑
Very confusing, I am not even sure I got my satoshi even though I "cashed out" there was a timeout but when I reopened, the satoshi was gone and I started over from 0. Also very slow accumulation. No ads but laggy and slow to earn.
Cloud Bitcoin Miner - Remote BTC Earnings : ☑☑☑☑
Have only had this app for about a week and have already accumulated more than after several months of having the Cloud BTC Miner. Easy to use and minimal ads.
Coinbase: ☑☑☑☑
So far so good, I get notifications when ever I cash out in my BTC apps (for the most past, have not seen the add from Cloud BTC) In addition to being a widely accepted wallet you can also buy/trade cryptocurrencies at a low cost. I myself tosse $5 in.
| 1 Satoshi | = 0.00000001 ฿ |
|---|---|
| 100,000 Satoshi | = 0.00100000 ฿ |
| 1,000,000 Satoshi | = 0.01000000 ฿ |
| 10,000,000 Satoshi | = 0.10000000 ฿ |
| 100,000,000 Satoshi | = 1.00000000 ฿ |
Friday 30 November 2018
Friday November 30, 2018
37° dark and cloudy listening to the newest episode of a YouTube channel I very much enjoy, Edge of Wonder. Ben & Rob are great.
Visited my dispensary today, Nature's Care so for the next few weeks we will be partaking in Cresco Snow Lotus, a 'refresh' hybrid & a Gelato Stix. Took some pictures of the sky this after noon when picking up my son from school, there was an off rainbow bouncing off a cloud I will tri to up load it or will include in my YouTube videos.
So today I finally had to concede. If I am subject to banking fees so much I will bankrupt us so I went in and closed my bank account. Will update my payment info so the direct deposit will go into Our checking account in his credit union.
I am both relieved and saddened by this need to close my account as now I will have to ask when ever I want to purchase something, all things must go through my husband so I don't mess up our finances, especially now that I am hardly making any money now and our son's birthday and Christmas are both around the corner!
LB
6:31 pm 31° tuning in to watch us while researching Frequency Control and how we are all effected.
Visited my dispensary today, Nature's Care so for the next few weeks we will be partaking in Cresco Snow Lotus, a 'refresh' hybrid & a Gelato Stix. Took some pictures of the sky this after noon when picking up my son from school, there was an off rainbow bouncing off a cloud I will tri to up load it or will include in my YouTube videos.
So today I finally had to concede. If I am subject to banking fees so much I will bankrupt us so I went in and closed my bank account. Will update my payment info so the direct deposit will go into Our checking account in his credit union.
I am both relieved and saddened by this need to close my account as now I will have to ask when ever I want to purchase something, all things must go through my husband so I don't mess up our finances, especially now that I am hardly making any money now and our son's birthday and Christmas are both around the corner!
LB
6:31 pm 31° tuning in to watch us while researching Frequency Control and how we are all effected.
Thursday 29 November 2018
Day 1, No more composition Notebooks
Thursday November 29, 2018 6:01 pm 31℉
Today is as good a day as any to start, I have been procrastinating for too long so here we go. No more composition notebooks, Time to move ahead and enter the digital generation. I will however use this in the very same way as I did my composition notebooks, Dark and chilled but clear, will see if I can see anything in the sky tonight if it really is clear. Been rather cloudy and drab.(Melanie Martinez - Crybaby album playing)
Nice to have gotten my State ID for a legal cannabis dispensary so I shall also document which strain and method I am partaking in. Tonight we will enjoy a hand twisted RAW cone of Kubbie Kush (indica).
Since this is essentially day one, let me catch you up to speed, I am flirting with fifty, have a beautiful son and loving husband, but I also have several dark acronyms. PTSD, MDD, BPSA, Anxiety and more. I know that as someone who tries to live each day while battling inner demons it is not easy to communicate what you are dealing with. Those around you who love you can't possibly grasp what we are going through because we ourselves don't even understand it at times.
Time to go look up... till then...LB
Today is as good a day as any to start, I have been procrastinating for too long so here we go. No more composition notebooks, Time to move ahead and enter the digital generation. I will however use this in the very same way as I did my composition notebooks, Dark and chilled but clear, will see if I can see anything in the sky tonight if it really is clear. Been rather cloudy and drab.(Melanie Martinez - Crybaby album playing)
Nice to have gotten my State ID for a legal cannabis dispensary so I shall also document which strain and method I am partaking in. Tonight we will enjoy a hand twisted RAW cone of Kubbie Kush (indica).
Since this is essentially day one, let me catch you up to speed, I am flirting with fifty, have a beautiful son and loving husband, but I also have several dark acronyms. PTSD, MDD, BPSA, Anxiety and more. I know that as someone who tries to live each day while battling inner demons it is not easy to communicate what you are dealing with. Those around you who love you can't possibly grasp what we are going through because we ourselves don't even understand it at times.
Time to go look up... till then...LB
Tuesday 16 October 2018
Welcome to my world.
Herein I hope to provide you with entertaining and interesting Content.
Everything from Food Reviews to Ancient origins and more.
If there is a particular topic you would like to have me blog on, feel free to let me know and I will do my best to accommodate you.
In the mean time, may join relax with a nice cup of tea and travel down the rabbit hole with me.
Inside each of us there lives a small spark, larger for some, but none the less it is there. That piece that makes you question things. The part that does not care what others think of your demeanor or appearance, when you feel free. That is me, Lucia Bain. While I am actually a persona and pen name for my unknown author.
This is what I hope you will connect with, share in with me.
Inside each of us there lives a small spark, larger for some, but none the less it is there. That piece that makes you question things. The part that does not care what others think of your demeanor or appearance, when you feel free. That is me, Lucia Bain. While I am actually a persona and pen name for my unknown author.
This is what I hope you will connect with, share in with me.
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